My Hello Kitty Tattoo!

The meaning of this tattoo...Besides the fact that I have loved Hello Kitty since she was born on November 1, 1974! She represents a guardian angel that watches over us. The 3 blue stars coming off the wand stand for my 3 boys and the clouds are for the worst day off my life when my middle son almost died on Feb. 18, 2009. Some people seek counceling, some get a massage but I think getting a tattoo helps me the most!
It's on my left shoulder more towards the middle of my back and I love it!
This was taken a few hours after she was finished so there's still some redness. I'll take another pic when she's healed in a few weeks.

A little late, but Happy Easter!

Still here...

I haven't had much time to write lately. Busy, busy, always something going on. I know I had said I was going to write the 2nd part about Chase but everytime I think about it, it makes me sick. So I'll just talk about the good things.

Chase is doing very good. Still on his meds and breathing good. He's able to run and play and enjoy being an almost 9 yr. old little boy =) His eczema is also under control and he looks wonderful! It's great to see him healthy and happy!
He turns 9 next month and is so excited and can't wait. He wants a new bike really bad so that's what we're going to get him.

Logan is 4 now. He turned 4 two days before all the stuff with Chase happened so I never was able to post about it or post pics. He did have a great b-day party at the bowling alley and got lots of nice presents. I'll try to post some pics soon.

Bren is doing good too. Got that 13 yr. old attitude going on but not too bad.

Me, I am trying to put all the bad stuff behind and move forward. It's not been easy and sometimes the bad things creep back into my thoughts but I shut them out just as quick! I've been keeping busy doing school with the kids, cleaning, cooking, ya know the norm. I got a new tattoo 3 weeks ago. All of my tattoos have meaning and it's seems that when I'm getting them done it pumps out all of the bad out of my body. It's almost like therapy! This new one represents that bad day in February. It's a Hello Kitty Guardian Angel. (I chose Hello Kitty to represent the Angel b/c I have loved Hello Kitty my whole life) She has a wand in her hand and above it are 3 blue twinkle stars that stand for my 3 boys. Around her are clouds. It's pretty and I like it. I know how a lot of people think and I don't care, it's my personal choice. It's on my left shoulder between the blade and spine so it's not seen unless I have a bathing suit on. I will post some pics of that soon too.
Yesterday, Eddie and I celebrated our 16th Wedding Anniversary! We went to Sullivan's Steakhouse. My parents watched the kids. That was the first time I've been out this year! We had a nice, quiet dinner and it was very good. After we weren't sure what we wanted to do but my brother text me and told me he, Jess and a few other friends were at a little bar we like to go to so we went there and hun out for a while. We had a great time!

Ok, well, that's about it for now. I'll get some pics posted soon.
~K

Chase Update Part 1

I wrote last week about my middle son Chase being in the PICU so this is the follow-up. I had written a post about how he had been sick and not getting better but never got around to finishing it and actually posting it. (for those who don't know Chase has Hyper IgE syndrome, allergies, asthma and eczema) Chase had been sick since Thanksgiving. We went to the Doctor and he gave him Zithromax, Orapred (steroid) and told us to keep on his asthma treatment, Xopenex. He was fine for a while then it came back around New Year's. Went back to the Doctor and he gave him Zithromax, Orapred and more Xopenex. Again, he got better. It started coming back again! We went back to the doctor February 11 and again he put him back on the same meds. But this time he didn't respond to any of it. He was coughing, wheezing and not looking good. Wednesday morning (Feb. 18) he was looking really bad. I made an appt. with his doc and as we were getting ready around 7:45 a.m. I had Chase do another asthma treatment.

(This is the part that is really hard for me. But I'm thinking if maybe I can type it out and get it written out it will help? I don't know. But I think I might need to take a few breaks while writing this part b/c it makes me want to throw up and cry and just freak out)

I kept checking on him as I was getting everything ready and as I walked by I asked him if he was ok and then realized he was turning purple. He couldn't answer me, his eyes rolled in the back of his head and he started to fall over on his bed. I caught him. I already had my phone in my hand so I dialed 911. I put the phone to my ear and carried him to the couch. First mistake. 911 answers, I scream my address into the ladies ear. She tells me to calm down to tell her what's happened. I tell her. She asks if he's on a flat surface I tell her no, he's on the couch. She tells me to lay him on the floor...I lay him on the floor and before she tells me I start CPR. She tells me to wait. She wants to know if he's breathing at all. It looks like he's trying to but can't. She wants me to get a pulse but I was freaking out so bad I couldn't find it. So she tells me to start CPR and walks me through it. I tilt his head up, pinch his nose and blow 2 breaths in and watch to see if his chest rises. It does. Then she tells me to start compressions. 30 and count them out loud. I do and she tell me to go faster. While I'm doing this though Brenden (13) is in the backround, freaking out, crying, screaming. I tell him to go find a neighbor to help. Logan is in his bedroom, Bren had closed the door so he wouldn't know what was going on. (thank goodness) I do 2 more breaths and 30 more compressions and EMS shows up. I back away and let them do their job. They are jamming things everywhere and have the Ambou bag thingy on his face while someone is sqeezing it. I call my husband and tell him to come home immediately, no questions asked he leaves then. Chase was just laying there lifeless and I kept asking the EMS people if he's going to be ok and one of them shakes their head no and another tells me to call my husband back and tell him to go straight to the hospital. That's where I black out. I do not remember anything between that point and then standing behind the ambulance as they were loading him in. I didn't pass out, but I just can't remember. It's weird. I have no clue how much time passed or anything. But I know I didn't call my husband back b/c I remember as they were putting Chase in the ambulance him driving up and having to park at the end of the street. We live on a small street and the Sheriff's had blocked it. So I'm trying to get in the ambulance b/c there's no way I'm not riding with him. And the EMS woman tells me I have to calm down and if I can remain calm I can ride in the back. I remember saying "I'm calm". She lets me get in and while they are hooking things up my husband comes to the side door of the ambulance and is trying to talk to Chase. And Chase tries to answer to him! He had an oxygen mask on his face but he was trying to talk! It was like the best thing I've ever heard in my life! I was so happy to hear him. Eddie ran in the house and got Bren and Logan ready along with the help of a neighbor. Then had to wait as the Firemen cleaned up the floor with all their supplies. We were off in the ambulance in morning rush hour traffic. I just kept talking to Chase the whole time. He was weak but kept on trying. A few minutes before we made it to the hospital I heard them call in to the ER to let them know he was improving. It seemed we got there pretty quick. They rushed him into the peds ER and a ton of medical people were all waiting for him. They did they're stuff and I remember Chase calling for me but I had to stand back as not to get in the way. I told him I was there for him but that I needed to be out of the way, I felt so helpless. Shortly after Eddie and the kids got there. Eddie came back but Bren and Logan had to wait in the waiting room. Thank goodness they have those Child Life girls there that help out. One was in the waiting room with Bren and Logan talking with them and watching them and another was in the ER talking with Chase reading a Cars book and having him point out pictures to her. Those girls are wonderful! He improved so much once in there and he surprised everyone. He was breathing on his own with oxygen assistance and they thought they were going to have to put him on the machine. Thank goodness they did not have to. After being in the ER for many hours and having a million tests, blood work and an X-ray they told us we were being sent to PICU. He was stable but needed oxygen and to be monitored closely.

Once we got to the PICU they made Eddie and the kids go to a waiting room. They had to prepare Bren and Logan before they would be allowed in. So I went in to the PICU with Chase and as we walked past the open curtain rooms I could see all the kids in there. It was the scariest thing ever for me. I've never seen anything like that. No one took me aside to prepare me for what I was about to see. I had been trying to keep my cool all morning and not cry in front of him but when I got in there I lost it. But Chase didn't see me, they were setting him up in his room and I turned around at the nurses desk. Once they got him set up and hooked up to everything I closed the curtain and sat in the bed with him, just looking at him and so thankful that he was going to be ok. A few minutes later they let Eddie and my other 2 sons back. They were being nice b/c Logan is only 4 and I think the sign said you had to be 13 or 14 to go in and only 2 people were allowed back at a time. But being the Child Life girls had prepared the kids they let them come back. That was so nice of them.

I'll post the 2nd half tomorrow.

Pediatric Intensive Care Unit

I'm typing on my iPhone from a hospital bed in PICU at OLOL. My Chase, almost 9 is in here. This will be day 3. He is stable, breathing on his own now w/o oxygen assistance and getting stronger each day. What we/he needs right now is lots of prayers and good thoughts!
When my hubby comes later on I'll have him bring the laptop so I can type like a normal person and explain why we're in here, the scariest thing that's ever happened to me and the importance of knowing child CPR. Seriously, doesn't matter how old you are go register now! Even if you already have but it's been many years like me a refresher never hurts. When we get out and back to normal my whole family is going!

Taco Soup

I tried this recipe last night. It was awesome! Even my 3 yr. old who usually won't eat told me " this soup is GOOD"! It's easy and cheap to make.

Taco Soup

2 lbs. lean ground beef
1 chopped onion
1 pkg. taco seasoning
1 can pinto beans
1 can pinto beans w/ jalapenos
1 can shoe peg (white) corn
1 lg. can crushed tomatoes
1 can mild rotel
2 cans beef consomme'
1 pkg. dry ranch dressing mix

Brown meat and onion. Add taco seaoning and cook down for 10 min. Add all other ingredients. Stir well and cook on low for 1 1/2 hrs. stirring often. (Be sure to let simmer for the full amount of time. I tasted it right when I first added all the ingredients and it wasn't so great. But wow, after letting it cook and mesh it was awesome!)

Serve topped with crushed fritos or tortilla chips, sour cream and cheese. Yum!

King Ranch Chicken

1 Chicken, boiled & de-boned (reserve chicken broth) or you can cook 4 chicken breast and cut them up.

1 medium onion, chopped

1 medium bell pepper, chopped

1 can cream of mushroom or cream of chicken soup

1 can rotel (i chose mild)

2 cups shredded cheddar cheese

Seasoning: salt, pepper, tony's, garlic powder, cumin and chili powder

Saute onions and bell pepper until tender. Add to bowl with cooked chicken, mix and set aside. In another bowl mix soup and tomatoes and add seasoning to taste 1/4 tsp. cumin and 1 tsp. chili powder and a few dashes of garlic powder.
In 9 x 13 pan (greased) line with 4 tortillas (if you have chicken broth left you can soften them first in that) and top with 1/2 of the chicken/onion/bell pepper mix. Then line 4 more tortillas on top of that and add the rest of the chicken mixture. Now pour the soup/tomato mixture on top of that. Top with the shredded cheddar cheese.
Bake at 350* for 20 -30 minutes or until cheese is melted and browning on edges.

Ladies Wine and Recipe Exchange

On Saturday, January 24, my neighbor hosted our 1st Ladies Wine and Recipe Exchange. We all met at her house at 5:30 and brought our drink of choice and each of us brought a small dish for everyone to taste. There were 7 of us there and we had a great time! I brought Chicken Spectacular, I'll post the recipe this week. And the other recipe's brought were: King Ranch Chicken, Taco Soup, Tomato Basil Soup, Cream Cheese Dip, Crawfish Dip & Bean Dip. They were all very good. I'll post the recipe's for those later this week as well. I did try the King Ranch Chicken tonight and my family really liked it. I'm trying the Taco Soup tonight.
We had such a great time that we are going to keep doing our little get together every few months. It's a great way to get out for a little bit and enjoy good food and friends =)

Electric box and pole are fixed!

The work was completed last Tuesday but I was so freaking mad it's taken me a week to calm down over what happened after it was done! The electrician came out last Tuesday around 8:30. He was there ready to start but had to wait for Entergy to come out and cut the wires to my house. Well, he didn't feel like waiting and goes up and cuts them himself. So the power to my house was cut around 9 a.m. Less then 15 minutes later Entergy shows up and sees that he already cut them. The guy didn't sound too happy and told the electrician he needs to make sure that he doesn't reconnect them and to wait for them. So he does the work and finishes up around 11 a.m. Right when he finishes the city inspector shows up and approves everything. He tells me that Entergy should be back out to reconnect by 2 or 3 and if they are not to start calling them. So 3 p.m. comes around and no one has come so I start calling. The first time I didn't talk to a real person, just listened to a recording that said I was due for reconnect that day. By 4:30 I called again and this time talked to a real person. He said someone would be out between 3 and 7, ok. Well, then by 7 no one had come and it was dark and we were getting pissed. I had to go pick up some dinner for us since I couldn't cook and my stuff in the fridge was starting to get a little warm. So I call again and talk to another real person and she says they don't stop til they finish all the requests for that day, so I'm like ok. We wait and wait and nothing. I called many times up until about 2 a.m. and just got recordings. So we went to bed around 2. Thank goodness it was actually kinda warm that night and not freezing cold! I was up again at 6 a.m. and got a real person on the phone again. She put in an emergency request and told me to call back at 7 a.m. when they open. So I call again at 7 a.m. and they apologize and say they don't know what happened, I filed a complaint b/c that is just unexcusable. What if my son had an asthma attack? I wouldn't have been able to plug his machine in? And I ended up losing my food in the fridge and freezer.
So anyway, around 8 someone from Entergy calls to see if someone has been out yet and I tell her no. She says they should be there shortly. Around 9:15 a guy shows up, finally. He tells me they must have just forgotten about me! It took him about 45 minutes to reconnect the wires and we were back with power by 10. And thank goodness b/c it was raining off and on and got much colder!
So the pole and box are fixed but man why can't anything ever go smooth? What a pain in the ass!
Now, all we have left is the inside ceiling sheetrock but ya know what? I'm tired of dealing with the insurance company and contractor so I'm just gonna leave it for now. I can fix most of it myself anyway.

Can't Find my Camera Cable!

Grrrr... I can't find my cable for my camera to upload my pics! I want to put up some more pics. It's gotta be around here somewhere! I put up a new profile pic, taken on my phone of course.
And I have a few unfinished posts as well. I'll try to finish those and get them up this weekend!

Still...

getting things fixed 4 months after that damn hurricane! So yeah, the roof is done. Now the next thing is the electricity box. Before the hurricane it was already being pulled from my house because the energy company changed the pole that my electric wires are connected to. When they moved the pole it pulled on my wires and started to pull the electric box off the back of my house ( i told the electric company this and they said it wasn't their problem that I would need to get an electrician and pay for it myself!) . So then when hurricane Gustav hit the wind moved the pole and pulled my wires even more and pulled the nails out more. Well, after they finished the roof and I was looking back there I noticed the box was pretty much hanging off! Not good! So I have been calling my roofer who is really a general contractor and asking him if he could get his electrician out to look at it. I figured we'd just stay with him instead of calling around and finding the electrician ourself. So anyway, my roofer calls me this morning to tell me the electrician came out and his charge to fix the electric box is going to be $1,135! Yes, he must be crazy! The insurance company only gave us $300. So I call my husband and tell him and he's like no way, we'll get another estimate. So he calls another company and they came out within 15 minutes! The guy takes a look at the damage and tells me it'll cost between $300 and $400. Whoo, ok, much better! So he is coming out next Tuesday to fix it. Now I have to call the roofer to tell his guy not to come out. I'm sure he'll be pissed but oh well, he shouldn't have tried to jack up the price on me so much.
And after that's finished we still have the inside repairs to do, the sheetrock and drywall. He said he was going to send someone out this week to come do it but I was like nope. First you need to come and write up an estimate telling me exactly what's being done and then give me a total price! Because I'm sure he's going to try to jack me on that too. I guess if he trys that I'll just find someone else!

Rock & Rye Whiskey

Have you heard of this before? Well, most people haven't. It's a rye whiskey mixed with rock candy and fruit. It's a little sweet and a little thicker than regular whiskey. I would call it very smooth. Anyway, back in the old days this was prescribed as a cough suppressant. When my Dad was a little boy and his Dad was in the Navy he was told to drink this and when I was younger my Grandma would give it to me. We're all sick here with this sore throat, cough, sniffle thing and I remembered the Rock & Rye. So I went online to see if it was even still made and it is! But before ordering some I figured I'd call around town first. The first place I called had no idea what I was talking about, but the second place knew exactly what I was talking about! And they had it in stock. So this afternoon I drove all the way across town to Marcello's Liquor store off Perkins. The guy I had spoken to on the phone with was right there and took me right to it. They only had 2 bottles left b/c he said a few other customers had come in looking for it for the very same purpose I was. It is made by LeRoux and was only $10.99. And I have to say that the whole staff at this liquor store was so nice, very friendly. While there I also looked for a Guatamalan Rum my Dad was wanting and they had that as well. They had just about every kind of liquor you could possibly imagine. On the way out one of the girls asked me how I had heard about the Rock & Rye cough remedy...she said they had so many people talking about it that she wondered if we had seen it on TV or something. Nope, just an old time remedy. But if you have a cough and a sore throat this stuff really does work. And it tastes good too!
Ok, off to take a shot and then get some sleep so I can get better.
Night!

Busy Sunday

We had 2 birthday parties today. Both at the same time! My nephews was at the bowling alley from 2-4 and my friends son's was at The Little Gym from 2:30-4. So I decided that Eddie would take our 2 older son's to the bowling party and I'd take Logan (almost 4) to the little gym party.
But before we went to go look for some shoes and jeans for my oldest son. We went to a few places but didn't find anything so my hubby and the 2 older boys went to the mall and me & Logan went to Walmart to get a gift for the party we were going to. We got him the Discovery viewfinder and a Shrek reel. Those things are pretty cool. They even talk to you now! Back in the day ours did not talk with each push of the button.
So after that we made our way on over to the party for 2:30. It was a cute little place. Had a gymnastics room with like mini size equiptment. Just right for the little ones. Logan ran right in and started playing. Running and jumping and walking on the balance beam and jumping off and then jumping up to the uneven bars yelling "Buzz Lightyear and Beyond" LOL! He was so cute. I saw a whole different side of him without his 2 mean big brothers around. They did little activities, like dancing and jumping and then they rolled out this big flat blow up jumpy thing. He had a lot of fun jumping on that. He had so much energy!
When we got home a little after 4 my husband and sons were already home. They had found some more deals at the mall. They got 3 pairs of jeans, 1 pr. shorts for 50% off and some Nike Shox regular $107 on sale for $79. So now my oldest son has clothes and shoes and can longer complain that he doesn't have anything to wear!

Gotta love after Christmas sales!

We went to Dillard's this evening looking to buy some clothes for my oldest son and boy did we hit the jackpot! We were downstairs browsing when one of the sales ladies came and told me that we should check the clearance they had upstairs. Now, I hate shopping off clearance racks. Not that I don't love a great deal, it's just that it's such a pain to dig through racks of clothes that are just shoved there and all the sizes are mismatched etc. And b/c I always have the kids with me and they won't stay still long enough for me to dig. But we went ahead and dug through the racks and ended up finding some awesome deals. In the end we got 19 shirts, all name brand for 81 dollars and some change! When we got home I took all the tags and added them up by original price...the total was almost $600! Holy cow!
Now he needs pants and tennis shoes! So tomorrow we're going shopping again to see if we can find some more deals.

The Roof is Done!

They finished around 10 a.m. this morning. It looks great! I didn't get any pics yet but will soon.
Now onto the other stuff. An electrician was supposed to come by today. I'm not sure if he did b/c I had to leave but I should have an estimate for that soon. Hopefully, it won't be too bad. All he needs to do is reattach the electric box back to the house. Then in the next few weeks my contractor will send someone to fix my sheetrock and drywall inside. So at least things are moving along and getting taken care of.

I Have a Roof Again!

The roofers came this morning, a little later than expected due to an order that wasn't ready for pick up yet but they made it! They got up there and got things going pretty quick. Unfortunately, once they got the tar paper scraped off we could see the extent of the damage. Much of the plywood was rotten. Thank goodness the roofer estimated the amount right and had just enough to replace the bad spots. It was kinda funny b/c when I pulled the door down to look in the attic it was bright and shiny sunlight with all the wood gone. It was very loud ALL day and the house shook and vibrated a lot, lol, kinda aggravating but in the end will be well worth it. They worked until dark and were close to finished when the owner called and said he didn't want the guys working in the dark so they had to stop. All they have left is 2 small spots and the ridge caps to finish. But it looks so much better already. We got Timberline 30 yr. architectural, and the color is weathered wood. It looks so nice. I'll take some pics when it's finished tomorrow!

Cleaning up

Today the weather was much better! I worked in the yard most of the day picking up and packing away our Christmas decorations. Then we cleaned up and mowed the yard. It looks so much better, but pretty boring with no decorations =(
But Valentine's day and Mardi Gras will be here soon so I'll be decorating again!
Tonight my roofer came by for me to sign the contract. He says they will be here at 7:30 a.m. tomorrow to start on the roof! Yea!

Happy 3 Kings Day!

Today is 3 kings day or also known as the last day of Christmas. To read more about 3 kings day go to this link-> http://three-kings-day.123holiday.net/
I always wait until 3 kings day to take down my Christmas decorations. And we eat King cake and have a nice dinner on this day. This year I had to take my tree down early b/c my middle son that has eczema and asthma really bad was sick and not getting better and the doctor thought he might be getting worse b/c we had a real Christmas tree in the house. Tomorrow when the weather is better I will take down the outside decorations and clean and mow the yard.

What a...

Crappy day! It's been raining all day. It dropped from 75 degrees to 55 degree within an hour. And more and more places in my house are starting to leak, yikes! I talked to my roofer again today, he's supposed to come tomorrow to show me the color samples and then start on the roof either Thursday or Friday!

Since I have nothing better to do, here are some New Year's Eve pics:

4 Months Later...

and I'm still dealing with the insurance company and roofer! I am just so ready for this to be done with! My roofer called me today to tell me he wants to get my roof on this week, yea! FINALLY! He asked me if I had heard from my insurance adjuster about the latest estimate he sent in. I hadn't and told him I'd give him a call. So I call my adjuster only to find out on his voicemail that he has been moved to another branch. Great, just great. It tells me to call the main Allstate number. So I call the main number and get reassigned to another adjuster and I should hear from him within 3 days. This will be my 4th adjuster, ugh.
Thank goodness the other adjuster had finished my second claim and I did receive a new check for the mold and internal damage claim for $4690. But we had sent in another claim right before Christmas for the costs of the materials that they jacked me on and a few other things. No one can find that one so now my roofer will have to fax it in again and we'll wait some more. But it won't affect getting the roof done because we have enough for that now. So hopefully we will be getting our new roof this week! And it's going to be the 30 yr. architectural roof not the crappy 3 tab and he's doing it for a great price! I'm just so happy because it's been raining a lot here and leaking a lot in my house, not good!
Later this afternoon the new adjuster called, that was pretty quick! So I called the roofer and left a message with him to fax the last estimate to the new adjuster. Hopefully this new adjuster will be as easy to work with as the last one.

Welcome 2009!

My first entry for 2009 =)
My hubby tried to fix my computer but the virus just kept renaming itself. It was a Virtumonde virus where it send you to the websites it wants to and keeps popping up their antivirus software for you to buy etc. Anyway, he wiped my computer clean and reinstalled everything. So now I'm good to go! And I wish I could tell you where I got the virus from but I can't remember the exact site. All I did was type in "Myspace happy new year comments" into the google toolbar. It brought up a list of sites and when I clicked on one of them my computer started getting all these popups! I now have AVG installed. I think we got it from CNET.com and it's a free program. It scans e-mail and websites.

So like that wasn't enough, new year's eve my camera's XD memory card decides to mess up! Everytime I would turn my camera on it would say turn off or format. That was the only 2 choices! And if I hit the format button it would say that all info was about to be erased! Thank goodness I had almost all my pics uploaded. So it was just the ones we had taken that night and my Christmas morning video. So Eddie went online and found a site that would allow me to recover the pics off the card before we reformat it. We did get the new year pics and 2 other video's but it won't give me my Christmas morning video, which really sucks!

Ok, so besides my electronics problems...we've had a good start to the new year. New year's day we went to my parents house in the afternoon to eat our black-eyed peas, cabbage and cornbread. It's a southern tradition! More info here... http://gosoutheast.about.com/od/restaurantslocalcuisine/a/blackeyedpeas.htm
My Dad cooks the cabbage and black-eyed peas (or Hoppin' John as they call it) and I make the cornbread. He does a really good job, it all tastes really good. So we ate that and had some summer sausage on the side. The kids wanted some more so I was cutting it with one of my Dad's super sharp knives and was trying to be careful b/c I know how sharp his knives were and of course I cut right into my thumb! Ick! It's a bad slice but didn't hurt, thank goodness!

This weekend it was kinda rainy and nasty so we didn't do much. Just ran a few errands and went to different stores checking out their after Christmas sales. We always find cool stuff at Radio Shack. We found a V-tech kidzoom digital camera and a V-tech CARS learning laptop for good prices so we went ahead and got those for Logan's birthday. It's coming up in February so now we won't have to be wondering what to get him!

Oh, and I was going to post some New Year resolutions, but ya know what? I never stick to them. So I'm thinking maybe I just won't make any this year and then there won't be any disappointment, LOL!